28th May 2011 - Day well spent!

It's been awhile since I have a day well spent hahaha.

I mean seriously :) awesomeness but daymm tiring whey!

Today woke up went to Kolombong for breakfast :D
wanted the red kon lo mee but they dont sell it anymore ): sobs..

Then, went Kolombong Giant~

brought back some three38eight productions memories HAHA.

Next stop: Kasih Sayang Resort on Kokol Hill.

1st time going thr lol~ it's a new place :3

smaller than I thot but the place was AWESOME~ LOVE THE WIND!

feels half like Kundasang :DD

found an awesome looking beetle <3

Other stops:

--> Berries Farm

Sabah Strawberry Plant! No fruits yet D:<

Sabah Raspberry :D
red= sour, black= sweeet/ ripe

--> Kokol Prayer Summit (just pass by haha..)

awesome building lah! >.<

--> Karambrunai Nexus Beach Resort & Spa (THIS! childhood >.<)

--> K.K.I.P best coconut pudding! & Shell Fish (Lokan Panggang)

After that, went home, BUT got locked out =.=

funny story. LOL. anyway, went to church directly.

--> Novena + Mass @ Sacred Heart Cathedral

after that, dinner at KFC @ 1Borneo followed by Kung Fu Panda 2! :DD

i saw a lokyuk jr. outside the cinema hall~ ^^

More things coming! :D

--> going pulau ;) um, gathering with frends, rock climbing, sing K :D etc!

P/S: i'm seriously gonna die D: with all the good food! urghh. and my parents are paying huhu! XD so... conclusion, go back melaka gotta starve myself or smth >.< cham lor cham lor!!

thots: you don't have to read this :)

the utmost loneliness is not one that you experience when being alone.

it is when you in the midst of so many people, yet you feel.. empty.

I'm feeling very edgy again.

it's hard to stop feeling like that some times?

I hate myself for being so easily influenced by others.

why? I really wonder. (in fact, I know the answer- I care too much)

Often than not, I feel that I'm a strong person, mentally at least.

as a girl, physical strength can be limited :/ nid I say more? haha.

anyway, but just a random thought... as I look back to certain parts of my life, I felt so vulnerable. It wasn't anything huge or what.. but just nvr thought that Joanna Ling would ever really be in such a state. Imagine that! I shocked myself. Thou, i've accepted that.. but I really don't like the feeling of being vulnerable. It makes me feel weak, hopeless, needy. I'm suppose to be the one whom people depend on. That's just the kind of friend I am. I wan to be a person who can stand on her own despite all the shit life has to offer but then again, at the same time, at some point, I guess I hoped someone would be thr for me to depend on too. I know there are people who are and will be thr for me, but I'm honestly telling you, it's either fate or luck, most of the time, the timing aint good and I oways, oways... choose to just let it settle deep inside. that's the problem I presume. that's why I'm learning to open up.

To the people whom I expose my weaknesses to,

just a note: if I come off as being a damn weak wuss, screw you.

It's just that I'm strong enough.

Who are you to judge?

To my best frends:
it's not that I dont trust you or I don't treat you fren enough,

it's just becz I grew up with Middle Child Syndrome- tendency to feel overlooked,

which made me unsure of how to express my thots and feelings.

so please... just bear with me, be patient with me and give me a push when I need it.

To strangers and other people:

I may come off as someone unapproachable and distant becz..

I've gone thru shit in my life. you know my name, not my story.

but if you get to know me, I'm pretty awesome IF and only IF you treat me right :P

Note to self:

It's ok to be not okay :)
Give it some time.

So, by the end of the day, I guess it's really no big deal. It just proves that I'm humane. No matter how hard I try to contain feelings or emotions, at some point, it just uncontrollably breaks out. Self-denial, self-pity, self-inflicted sufferings- realisations.

In conclusion, only you can make urself happy :)

Finally Back HOME ♥

sorry for the late update lol. damn busy :S

So yeah, Finals are over. but I don't feel as relieved as I thot.

What comes after exams? The RESULTs. urghh @@
don't wanna and won't think about it for now bah :)

anyway, PLS was kind ^^ easier than I thot haha.. ♥

English on the other hand.... -.- not enuf time oh.

hopefully I can get wad I targeted for >.<

So Sat and Sun was just hectic and damn exhausting.

Moved hse. haha. contented :) but I havent unpack... NO TIME!
I shall slowly do so after my holidays :D

Monday was all travelling and mapling.

MAPLE BIG BANG OUT LAR! DAMN SYIOOOK XD
high damage. havent explore places thou :)

shall do so with miy or my maple bii <3

Tues was slack day! But I din get to sleep as much as I wan =.=

nid to wake up to do chores. lolol...

and I got scolded for waking at 11am -.-

in Melaka, I wake at 2pm de lor. LOL.

yerr, I'm eating like pig lor. damn.

mum's cooking ^^ chicken soup! ♥ Sau Mai! ♥

and D:< I dont usually eat ice-cream BUT i ate a lot in the past 2 days ):

Anyway, today gonna go eat KK food :D
Luyang Kon Lo Mee ♥

then going Citymall to date with Ying ^^
she picking me up ler :P haha~

anyway, all the best to her and all those taking Chem Paper4! FIGHTING! ♥

I ♥ Mr. Azizie!

WOOOHU!

I had a great slp last nite! No insomnia huhu~
must be too tired from the f*cked up PIH -.-

anyway! TODAY WAS GREAT :)

I ♥ Mr. Azizie! He's just too awesome :D

huhu! satisfied with my paper today ^^

thank you God for everything!
and thanks to my friends, esp ying and tmc for supporting ^^

and now.... till the next nitemare, PLS & PLE.

I've got a bad feeling PLS (Law & Society) gonna be like PIH -.-

But.. I will try to be positive! :)

>.< HUAT AH..

3 down, 2 more to go!!

PIH screwed me over.

oh mai kott!
*invisible tears rolling like mad*

the paper this morning was WT HECK man!
MY GOODNESS.

gg.com ady lor.

Islamic Legal History- PIH = PAPER IN HELL.

damn.

My CGPA gone case ):

sho shorray...

*sniff sniff*

bolat study others liao. sien!

F-I! F-I! F-I!

I feel like changing course jor -.-
URGH TnT

Tomorrow is the day.

Time flies as we know it. and 2mr is the day.

the starting of my battles with the finals.

the last week of Foundation year.

Gonna miss it! not that I've accomplished much... haha..

anyway,

I really got to go back to study, so this is just a short post.

Insomnia is constantly killing me,

a barrier to effective studying actually.

Hope it doesnt haunt me anymore during the exam week!

Pray for me k? :)

All the best to all my frends who are taking their exams too!
Be it MMU finals or A-levels or whatever else! :)

Take care and do your best!

Health is most important..

Exams are about efficiency.
How much output u can produce in the allocated time with the input u have :)

- my beloved Paps <3

Cheers!

INSOMNIA [again]

shit wheyy. I WANT & NEED TO SLEEP!
but I just cant..

stupid coffee and tea.

NOT WORKING for my studies!
now cause me cannot sleep?

haijooooo!

anyway, technically ytdy,

spent 12hrs in McD! Studying EFF-ed up PLS (Law & Society)..

NOT DONE YET. urghhh. save me >.<

Going Secret Recipe 2mr...

Chiong Business revision & finish up on PLS Chap7.

sobs..

I cant wait for FINALS TO BE OVER.

but SHIT. I've got abt 1 and 1/2 more days to FINALS.

that's like rocket fast.

anyway, I'm like dying in lameness when hanging out with Fluffy, Pokey and Bloop.

LOL. damn serious!

to those with the chance, I'll show u the lameness soon XD

9 more days till HOME SWEET HOME <3

Freak out.

I'm officially sick !

yay me =.=

but thanks to negative feedback mechanism,

I'm feeling better after all the "blood shed".

My gosh, the moment i looked down,

blood literally flow out of my nose lah.

wont stop de some more.. I think i popped a capillary or smth.. O_O"

then I started to spit blood )):

haihss... stupid body, oways react like this.

I think one year average I can nose bleed like wad? 15 times? =.=

GG.com/rip-joanna_detail?php170013_I'MDYING.html/

finals in 5 1/2 days!

I'm gonnna DIIIEEE.

GOTTA REST! but GOTTA STUDY!

Getting back my balance (:

as some of my close frens would noe,

I was feeling uberly emo for the past few days.

>.< if you dont noe, dont worry bah..

not that I dont treat u as close frens,
but just din wanna bother u all since A-levels Exam coming soon!

anyway, I'm feeling better :)
thanks for the concerns~

Thanks to TMC bibii for oways "aiyayoo"-ing me hahaha..

Thanks to Pawwie for the good chat and advices last time :)
Thanks to Karine babehh for talking to me ^^

Thanks to Bloop2 (Fatinah) for being so cute. HAHA.
Thanks to Mami Pokey for worrying :P
Thanks to Dadi Fluffy for being LAMEE & bringing me out to dessert! :D

SR- Strawberry Marshmellow Cheese!

• Quote that got me back on my feet:

If you love something, let it go.

If it comes back to you, then it's yours forever.

If it doesn't, then it's never meant to be.

Sometimes, it just amuses me how people can be so close for a second,
and becomes like strangers in the next.

For now, I'll just focus on Finals! >.<

8 more days! I'm gonna DIEEE..

Feeling loved ♥

Hey! I just gotta BLOG this!

to make a confession, actually, ytdy was feeling down and emo lar :)
talked to a fren for awhile~ felt better ^^

but i woke up this morning feeling like shit. seriously.. >.<

i skipped English Tutorial. I um.. just really felt too emo. LOL.

God is awesome :)
He listens and He does things His way.

I really cant explain it...

wanna take this chance to thank my dear beloved friends...

for making me feel so much better.

i dont think you know hw much it meant to me, esp today :)

Tankiuu Mami (Pokey) and Dadi (Fluffy) for tapau-ing delicious lunch for me ^^

Food can really cheer up a person too! haha!

Tankiuu Modiot for the yogurt.
thou it was out of the blue (I really really dunno why she suddenly gave me yogurt!)

it just felt good and comforting, you know?

dem dem dem...

and lastly, thank you so so so much to a very special friend.. ♥

I love you! miss you damn much!

I just received a special OH MAI KOTT gift.

the thing that REALLY MADE my day.

I dunno why. Why why?!

every time I feel the lowest, when I rly wanna find you, even when I din..

but you just manage to make my day one way or another.

I damn seriously love you. ^^ and i damn well mean it ♥

I'm starting to believe in karma! XD

Maybe it's just God's way of comforting me I guess :)

thru my frends :D

♥p/s: i have certain reasons that made me cant disclose the person and the gift~ SOWWIE :)

# just for fun stats.

just wanna post some numbers on my phone stuff. haha.

Last time i cleared my phone... thr was 13k+ messages.

Today, I'm clearing my phone.. and there is 18204 messages!
I'm proud. hahaha.

omg. no wonder my phone sibeh the lag.

out of boredom.. i filtered my "Sent Messages"

5527 out of 8333 contained the word 'lol'.

4024 out of 8333 contained the word 'haha'.

LOL. I just feel that a msj without 'lol' or 'haha' sounds too serious :)
hence the over usage. haha.. ^^